valentines day

DISCLAIMER: i’m totally posting this against the little voice in my head screaming, “NO! don’t show the internet your wrinkles and rolls! you big, dumb idiot!” … but i told it to shut up, because it’s valentines day, and you totally deserve a piece of ass (and i just love all of you that much). and also, if you want to be a dillhole and tell me how gross i look, please do me a favour and send your hatemail to my email, or just shut your pie hole because even i deserve to feel hot for like, four seconds and it took me a ton of courage to actually post these. OH! and no stealing! DUH.

so! what did i do for valentines day? i broke into my boyfriend’s old house, got naked, and shotgunned a few beers in front of the camera.

all pictures by julie hope

did dan like it? ehhhh, not really. i knew it wasn’t his thing, and it’s not like he’s going to look at some pictures of me in my undernothings if he wants to get all hot and bothered… but it was totally a fun idea, and i must say that the lady behind the lens (a super good friend of mine/an old roommie) made all of my millions of insecurities disappear. it was a great experience and i totally had a hard-on for myself for the first time in years, even if it did only last, like, 5 minutes.

i hope your v-day was filled with blowjobs and hot makeouts and roses and chocolates!


– e


wizard staffs, tattoos… and getting over my ex-boyfriend


where to begin? although completely devastated, i really feel like this may be for the best. the last few months with andy were spent laying in bed, waiting for him to come home. when i wasn’t busting my butt to make him dinner, wash his laundry, and clean the house… that’s just what i was doing: waiting.

other than m, andy is the only person in the world i ever let myself get wrapped into. in the end, i dismissed my own happiness to try and keep him around- to try and make him want to spend the few minutes or hours of spare time he had, with me. don’t get me wrong, andy is a smart, loving, wonderful man… he’s just not ready to stop being selfish enough to make a relationship work. my heart will always ache for him, and i’ve come to terms with that. but now it’s time to make up for lost time.

moving out of andy and i’s home means a few things:
1. save, save, save.
2. buy a car.
3. discover myself again.

but before i do these wonderful things, i’m giving myself a week to absolutely fuck life, on a pretty seriously large scale.

within the next week i’ll be doing the following:
tegan & sara show, party at quinn’s, drinking with gindaisy, lazy movie day, dinner with my brother, yoga x 2, look at houses, take some time off work, go to montreal, buy new bras and panties, get ridiculous tattoos, party at bip’s house for sip’s birthday (involving twister, wizard staffs, and 90’s wrestling), go dancing… etc.

ah, yes.

my tattoo artist is a sick sadist, also… i love him.

R did another 2.5 hours on my chest last night.

collar bones + needles + 2.5 hours = FML.
(simple mathematics)

i got home and matty made andy and i salmon and rice (best BIL ever)… i chomped it down, showered, crawled into bed and DIED. i’ve been so exhausted lately. andy scratched my back for a bit and we spooned to keep warm. because, umm, did i mention our house is like, 100 years old and none of the walls are insulated, so our bedroom has NO HEAT. and it’s a big bedroom. getting up out of bed in the morning is so painful.

today we have our christmas potluck at work… i made scalloped potatoes- they’re slowcooking in the boardroom right now. there’s nothing i love more than an amazing feast on a blistery cold day!

tonight is lindsay’s birthday so we’re hitting up some pub in the west end to get rowdy.

tomorrow i blow my paycheque on the last of my christmas presents, and some work clothes for the business conferences happening next week.

busy little bee!

december’s calendar, and then some

dec 3 – tattoo appointment to work on chest piece

dec 4 – buy tights for saturday’s outfit

dec 5 – go to the gym with laura, have colleagues over for jello shooters, work christmas party at grace o’malleys

dec 8 – christmas shopping with the sister in-law

dec 12 – dancing with gen for her birthday

dec 17 – tattoo appointment to work on chestpiece

dec 20 – a christmas carol play with the parents, the boyfriend, my brother, and his fiancée, go to the airport for 7pm and leave for work conference in toronto

dec 21, 22, 23 – toronto for work conference

dec 24 – come to work for half a day, then go to the parents’ with the boyfriend, my brother, and his fiancée for drinks, food, and presents!

dec 25 – TBD

dec 26 – shopping with the boyfriend

dec 27 – open house/wine & cheese @ chris & barry’s new house

the boyfriend and i have made some pretty big decisions as of late. he’s buying the house we’re currently renting so he can flip it and resell. i’ll be moving in with my parents (GASP!) for about a year (or less) so i can buy a car and save enough money for the downpayment on the house the boyfriend and i will be getting together.

this is huge… i moved out when i was seventeen and have lived in about 6 houses since then. at least my new roomies (hi mum & dad!) are really laid back, easy-going hippie-type. this doesn’t mean that adjusting will be easy.

also, not sleeping next to the boyfriend every night = so sad. who is going to wake me up in the middle of the night by ripping off all the blankets, moving constantly, kissing my back in his sleep, or farting ALL THE TIME.

granted, i’ll probably feel much more rested… but it’s going to be really hard to get used to. i’m so used to cooking big dinners for us during the week, or getting ready together in the mornings. i love waking up early on saturdays, watching cartoons, making breakfast and then running arrands together. i’m sure we’ll still do all of these things, but it’s still hard.


list of things to do with saved money:
buy a bike
buy a car
get my wisdom teeth removed
buy glasses & contacts for 2010
update little moose-man on all his shots
get a gym pass
go to cuba with the boyfriend in april

wtf, none of this shit is sinking in!


– e


i haven’t had a blog in awhile… i’m lacking on the updates!

on the boyfriend front:
things are going as well as they could be, all things considered

on the book front:
sloooooooow process!

on the halloween front:
holy cow! what an awesome party (from what i can remember). clean-up lasted two days, and none of the paintings are back up on the wall yet. as for halloween day? i stayed in bed til about 9pm, when the boyfriend took me out for ice cream. aaaand then i promptly crawled back into bed upon my return.

on the doing-things-for-myself front:
friday i get (hopefully) the rest of the outline done on my chest piece, and then i return home for feast club fridays (pizza night!). saturday/sunday i’ll be going to toronto for wedding dress shopping with laura. hers, not mine!

on the money front:

that’s all for now… pictures to come!

– elle