the brother: It’ll be a good night. I plan on trying all 100 types of beer lol. Actually, that may cause death.
me: hahaha… I always say that, but then I go through the beer bible* and the waitress shows up and I get nervous so I just yell out the first thing that comes to mind which is usually “STRONGBOW” and then it’s awkward. for everybody.
the brother: seriously though… Strongbow? Nasty. Beer urine.
me: no it’s basically apple juice that gets you drunk. it’s like being a baby, but with better benefits.
the brother: hahaha, they should put that as their slogan.
me: yeah that, or “bring a diaper!”. but seriously, I think I have IBS.
the brother: Merry Christmas!!!
me: you would!
the brother: no, I did
the brother: literally.
* this is a real thing! the pub next to my house has a BEER BIBLE!